9/20/11
















Wow its insane how sometimes when you are introduced to an artist you love, years go by, and you slowly forget how in love you were with him, and how many emotions they brought into your life. This man followed me throughout my teenage years of endless complaints, running hormones, dark NY lonely nights on a roof in the east Village blasting music loud. Resting away on a Ham mick slowly breathing, and longing for something so far yet so close. Longing for love, and feeling it so near and steady, yet scattered and fascinating. This man helped me shape my brain and color it the ways the painting of my brain is meant to look like. I love him so truly and madly and i wish i could thank him one day for the wonders of him Music.



9/19/11


when i watch this it makes me feel blown back into proportions, and all the stupid shit i have to deal with, going from door to door searching for a job. Putting myself out there for some clinical psychologists, who i open my heart to, yet it is a form of a job interview that you are not even aware of, telling you and deciding for you, if you fit to work and heal children. It feels so strange to be so exposed and to feel uncomfortable continuously about who you are and what you stand for. it is indeed to easy to say; "yes, i should accept it, and not everyone is gonna love me", yet it seems as if no one wants me as their employee, which is such a basic small thing. So if no one wants me as their employee what are they gonna want me for? Be a  cam stripper for 5000$ a month ........Booooo

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